Bitcoin 2.0: Bitcoin’s Back, Back Again

Last summer, while continuing to invest in early-stage seed Bitcoin-related companies, I wrote a post titled “The Bitcoin Crunch.” That post tried to encapsulate and summarize what I saw bubbling up when seeded Bitcoin companies tried to go for their next round of funding. Just like the broadly named Series A Crunch hammered the over-funded seeded companies, the verticalized crunch on Bitcoin companies was brutal but necessary.

Since then, things have stabilized. The price of Bitcoin has steadied, but more importantly, bigger companies building critical infrastructure in the ecosystem were rewarded with larger sums of downstream funding – Coinbase, Chain, BlockCypher, and many others — not to mention 21e6′s mega ambitious round to build mining chips for electronic devices.

About a year ago, I wrote this opening paragraph:

Remember “The Series A Crunch”? Well, I think an offshoot of this will manifest itself across what feels like almost 500 Bitcoin related companies. I, myself – I am a Bitcoin believer and Bitcoin junkie. Yet, despite that optimism, I am continuously floored by just how many Bitcoin startups are out there. I don’t know who is funding them or how they’re making money to survive the typical cycles needed to make Series A investing, which I’ve recently heard defined as “when pros invest and set the terms.”

Here’s a brief snapshot of what Bitcoin 2.0 is shaping up to be:

Valuations Relatively Cheaper - With unicorn hunting distorting all sorts of investor behavior, investment firms with smaller AUM and/or a deeper conviction in this ecosystem can bridge or extend funding for quality teams at very reasonable prices. One could argue it’s a better bet for real venture right now vs paying up into a red ocean category where their may be only 1-2 survivors.

Weekend Hacks Not Getting Funded - The quick-release “me too” Bitcoin companies are fizzling out and not getting funded. It is tough for some, indeed, but unfortunately necessary. I hope the emergent platforms consider some of those former founders for operational roles in their companies. The seed market has rationalized on Bitcoin.

Making It Easier To Build On The Blockchain - We all know the 101 awesome things that theoretically “could” be built on the blockchain, but those aren’t being built just yet to a level where we can openly interact with them. In the meantime, blockchain middleware is emerging as a category — people who build systems that make it easier for developers to build on the blockchain.

Core Platforms Getting Funded - Coinbase is now the leading platform, and no one is close (in my opinion). I’m starting to see experienced entrepreneurs build on top of Coinbase with applications that have real world use cases right off the shelf. In the same way Uber wasn’t possible before the iPhone and maps, a new breed of companies that wouldn’t have otherwise been possible without Coinbase will slowly emerge.

Brief Announcement: No Book On Uber

I have a brief announcement to make. Last year, in the fall of 2014, I became interested in digging more into the factors in the world that helped give rise to a company like Uber. That interest grew to the point where I considered the idea of writing something more formal about it, and while I thankfully didn’t commit to a publisher (I talked to a few), I did commit to all of you that I’d write an e-book about it.

And, I started to. I had the outline done, and the first few chapters drafted. But, I will admit, two things occurred — one, the company itself is turning into an even bigger force than I had envisioned a year ago, and covering it is not only a full-time job (for someone else), but probably a task on that’s equivalent on difficulty scale as being a foreign bureau chief for a major newspaper in a different country. Two, I have some (good) changes coming up in work and in life that were somewhat unforeseen, and I need to focus my energies on these more immediate tasks.

So, with that, I cannot write the book I intended to. I just don’t have the time I thought I would have to devote to it. I will continue to write about aspects of the company, and while I’m sure at least 1-2 professional authors will write a book about Uber, the company itself — which was never an interest of mine — I’ll continue to blog shorter pieces about the underlying dynamics that have given rise to the Ubers, Postmates, and Sprigs of the world. The book about Uber should really be the domain of someone who is fully committed and focused on that singular task — it is as complicated as writing about one huge country with a global presence, and when that book’s eventually written, I will scurry to buy a copy and devour it.

Videos From The On-Demand Conference

It’s been a month since we organized The On-Demand Conference. The folks at TradeCraft were able to capture and upload media from the event, and there’s a great mix of content and knowledge from that day, now accessible to all below. I’ve tried to present the videos in chronological order, the best I could. As an investor in space, I particularly loved the sessions that focused on B2B on-demand (with Managed By Q, and others), the investor panel with Steve, Satya, Simon, and Patricia (which was very lively and touched on some controversial themes), and the panels on customer experience. But, of course, everything was great. Thanks to TradeCraft for organizing and creating this rich media for others to learn from.

My personal favorite was the start of the day — a fireside chat with Shervin. We discuss on-demand stuff, but really it was more of a chance for Shervin to share a rich history and reflection on his move to and time in the Valley. Shervin was one of the very first people I met when I moved here. He made time for me, and it was nice to reconnect and catch up in such a public way.

Finally, I had a chance to end the day with a short presentation on where I see the on-demand space headed. It’s about 10-minutes and has slides, and encapsulates much of my thinking around the topic right now.

On Demand Conference : Fireside Chat with Semil and Shervin Pishevar from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : Growth from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference: City Expansion from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : B2B from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : New Business Models from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference: Customer Experience And Brands from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : Building Blocks for On Demand from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : Below the API Divide from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : Investing from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

On Demand Conference : The Future of On Demand from Tradecraft on Vimeo.

A Response To AVC Re: Kozmo

There are a small handful of blogs/newsletters I read daily. The first one of those when I started on this path was AVC. About a week ago, Fred wrote a reflective post about the on-demand economy of today and all the startups who are riding this wave. You can read Fred’s post here, and the picture of Gotham Gal wearing the old Kozmo swag is awesome. (Kozmo was available in NYC right when I moved back after college to start working — I remember ordering from it a lot and how much free stuff they gave away.)

One of the lessons threaded throughout AVC is “history doesn’t repeat itself, but it rhymes.” The implication is the same themes emerge through cycles, even if today’s incarnation looks different from yesterday’s on the surface. In the post, Fred writes:

Kozmo pioneered the idea of same hour delivery in 1998, fifteen years before its time. Kozmo pioneered the idea of raising and spending hundreds of millions of dollars a year long before it became fashionable, even normal to do so. Kozmo nailed the practice of scaling while your unit economics are upside down. They took that practice into almost twenty markets before the capital markets turned on them and there wasn’t money available to incinerate anymore.

As someone who has spent a good portion of the time seeding and helping early-stage companies in the space, I wanted to digest Fred’s post and write out a structured POV on it. Briefly, here goes:

On Unit Economics: There’s a lot of truth to this and the arguments/concerns are sound. Early-stage investors have, in certain cases, given entrepreneurs incredible credit in advance of nailing unit economics. The reason they do so, I believe, is because there is some premium to proving, even in one market, that a team can create and deliver a service which triggers a behavior change. The next venture bet is on spreading out that behavior to other test markets. We will know in a few years if that was too much credit.

On Raising and Burning Hundreds of Millions: Outside of Uber, Lyft, Instacart, and a few others, there are more companies making noise about the on-demand economy than raising gobs of money. Sure, some of it is overfunded, but if you look at the base stickiness of those services, in many cases things can be justified, and many of the firms who are already into those companies have deep enough pockets to stay with them in the event of a turn in the market. Speaking of which…

What if Capital Markets Turn Suddenly? Many arguments here, but if it’s a general turn, and people have less disposable income, they may be more sensitive to overpaying for convenience and speed, and that could depress demand while also putting pressure on companies to raise prices, to price dynamically, and to bundle other services on top of the core. For those who are funded, while opening a city is a serious operational cost, most of these teams are expert in figuring out how much capital and time it takes for a city to become self-sufficient. The ones that can’t do that won’t survive.

Despite the froth in the category and acknowledging there will be some ups and down for companies to withstand, two things make me optimistic about the on-demand concept overall, moving forward:

Today’s Overall Competitive Structure: When Kozmo launched, people weren’t used to web-enabled inventory and delivery triggers. Now, we are, and huge companies like Google, eBay, Amazon, Walmart, and even Uber are all actively thinking about offering on-demand or scheduled services to increase the bond with their customers. These companies will certainly be acquisitive in the category (in this arms race) and provide a soft landing for many startups, assuming they haven’t been over-valued and assuming the core mobile and data teams come along for the ride.

Spreading the Concept to Business, Healthcare, etc: I am shifting my focus in this area to on-demand concepts that serve businesses as their customer (like Boomtown, and others), as well as spaces like healthcare and heavy industry. I am already seeing lots of activity, and there are more opportunities for founders to layer in SaaS+marketplace models into these startups given the customer base. Just like the sharing economy has spread to other industries like construction (Asseta, Cohealo, etc.), I suspect on-demand will as well. It’s just a matter of time.

FaceTime Elmo

In the absence of living near family or having “help” with our toddler, we have consciously succumbed to, at times, letting her enjoy an old iPhone here, the iPad there. On the one hand, I wanted her to get comfortable with the OS, and it’s been fun to watch her learn so quickly — one of the first things she learned, of course, was how to turn off the Airplane Mode setting her dad would enable. She can consciously take pictures and scroll through photos, but there’s also a cost — try getting any kid to put the device away, and may the force be with you.

Like many kids living away from family and grandparents, our kid loves using FaceTime. She’s more than familiar now with the user interface for FaceTime, the large screen devoted to the other person, with a picture-in-picture for her face. In her mind, I think, she feels that person is real. She’s met them before, but the full screen bleed on an iPad Mini makes their face come alive.

Now, hold on for a minute while I write a paragraph about Elmo. I know, I know. Very cliche, but I was amazed at just how fast our kid heard about Elmo, started asking for him, and then got attached — a stuffed animal Elmo, coloring books, the music, songs. You name it. She’s all in.

Then, a few months later, was with a friend in line waiting to get coffee, talking about our kids (and their affection for iPhones), and he talks about how the “Elmo Calls” app is a lifesaver. Brilliant idea. I downloaded the app for my daughter a few hours later, and it was fun to see her reaction. She immediately recognized the interface of FaceTime, and she immediately knew Elmo, so in her mind, she was just FaceTiming with Elmo. She was so happy, it was a very natural high. To her, Elmo was just another real person to talk to. The software just faded away and she thought she was speaking to a friend.

I tweeted about this a few months ago and had been meaning to write this post. Here’s the thread, which you can open up to reveal the comments. Turns out “Elmo Calls” was a project born out of IDEO, where they originally were designing the app to help toddlers get potty trained, but in their user-testing, they discovered the kids only wanted to talk to Elmo. And, thus, “Elmo Calls” was born ;-)



Beau Biden And Climbing The Right Hill

If you haven’t already, make sure to watch and/or read President Obama’s eulogy for Beau Biden, the son of his Vice President. It’s such a textured speech that reveals so much about Obama’s relationship with the Senior Biden, Biden’s family and son, and what it means to create and leave a legacy.

In re-reading the speech and all the rich characteristics that made up Beau Biden, it reminded me one of my favorite blog posts (back from 2009) called “Climbing The Wrong Hill.” This post has had a huge influence on me as I’ve traversed a career here in the Valley. Here’s the post, and here’s a short video clip we recorded with the author of the post.

Obama goes into great detail about Beau’s history. A sample paragraph goes like this:

Beau didn’t cut corners. He turned down an appointment to be Delaware’s attorney general so he could win it fair and square. When the field was clear for him to run for the Senate, he chose to finish his job as A.G. instead. He didn’t do these things to gain favor with a cynical public –- it’s just who he was. In his twenties, he and a friend were stopped for speeding outside Scranton. And the officer recognized the name on the license, and because he was a fan of Joe’s work with law enforcement he wanted to let Beau off with a warning. But Beau made him write that ticket. Beau didn’t trade on his name.

As I was re-reading the speech, it was clear Beau was always climbing the right hill.

The lesson in the post from Chris was to not climb the wrong hill. So, we try to avoid those wrong hills, but how do we have the sense, the perception, and the awareness to know we are climbing the right hill in our journey? In the original post, Chris writes:

But the lure of the current hill is strong.  There is a natural human tendency to make the next step an upward one.  He ends up falling for a common trap highlighted by behavioral economists:  people tend to systematically overvalue near term over long term rewards.  This effect seems to be even stronger in more ambitious people.  Their ambition seems to make it hard for them to forgo the nearby upward step.

As all of us progress in whatever we seek to focus on, there will be more offers, more temptations, more pressures of life…we grow older, we have families, we focus our work in specific areas (at the expense of others), and we increase the likelihood that we need a hill to find, climb, and rest on top of. But, how do we choose? People will say things like “listen to your gut,” or “sleep on it” or “do what feels right.” The problem in the hill climbing scenario, of course, is that we don’t know really. and when we eventually choose one hill, there’s no turning back, we get closer to some on that same hill and we drift away from others who inhabit the other hills. But, that is mostly about work. In life, Beau seemed to be constantly searching for the right hills to climb — something we can all strive for.

Who Let The Conch Out?

One of the great stories of our time is the multiple “Arab Springs” that networked-devices and social media enable in big and small forms. One way to think about that shift is: Distributing computing power across citizenries can create a stronger force than concentrated authorities. As centralized authorities lose power with tech distributing among citizens, we may also expect a less orderly transition to what is next — the next order. That “less orderly transition” will be a test for how we all collectively behave when no one is watching yet everyone is watching.

Over four years ago, before I even worked at a real web/mobile tech startup, I wrote a guest column on TechCrunch titled, “The Next Mass Consumer Social Wave: Political Expression.” It’s worth re-reading today as so much has happened since then (click here for link). I wrote this a few weeks after the Arab Spring protests in Egypt. That was a crazy time. As a student of history, I couldn’t believe what was happening in real-time. The future arrived very quickly. I am still in shock this is only four years ago, especially when I see lines like this:

Most citizens in the Middle East do not have these luxuries we take for granted. For them, nations like GMail, Facebook, and Twitter provide that place, a common platform which helps them tap, refine, and express an assortment of pent-up desires, and as we have seen, generate tremendous kinetic energy most levees cannot withstand.

In the old days, centralized or local (or surveillance) teams would gather footage, but then decide editorially whether or not to broadcast that information; today, with ubiquitous data and pocket-based computing, with broadcast television powers in our pockets via Periscope and Meerkat, with social networks like Facebook and Twitter to host and route information, we see a lot more of our world. Capturing, uploading, and sharing 1st-hand citizen accounts is the new voting.

Are we decaying as a society, or just seeing more of what had always been happening under our noses? There’s so much to say, but I wanted to keep this apolitical and brief. I’ll close with two (2) thoughts:

One, so much of today’s discourse reminds me of Golding’s “Lord Of The Flies.” Who has The Conch? We can’t talk about (dis)order without revisiting the symbolism of The Conch. It used to be central authorities or networks — now the conch is distributed, so things sound noisier, and things feel disorderly. because we have to listen to 1,000 conches — not just one. Things may get worst before they get better.

Two, in an optimistic sense, I try to draw personal inspiration from this change, however bumpy and unsavory it is. Back in high school, my focus and ambition was to enter the world of politics in some way. That evolved and refined over time. I wanted to have an international life, to be a diplomat, to serve in foreign areas. I was dealt a setback in the college admissions process, and then turned to (almost) studying law as a means to exercise that desire. Luckily, a former boss stopped me from going to law school. Yet, the dream of international diplomacy still pulled at me, taking me to graduate school and a course of study focused on this — yet again. And, again, I was passed over, repeatedly. The worst experience was having an official from a not-to-be-named central authority request an interview, only to have the civil service employee arrive late, unprepared, and in sweat pants.

I couldn’t have imagined a career investing in technology. I do not know much about investing or technology. But, it is the path I’m on, and the best part is that some of the change I hoped to be a part of via diplomacy may not just also happen via technology, I may in fact be in a stronger position to advocate for it. Specifically, that could mean studying and investing in technologies that (1) increase and democratize web/app access for more and more people; (2) provide alternative, ad-hoc, and mesh networks for people and machines to communicate within; (3) foster new payment mechanisms which lower costs, provide different types proof (time, payment, justice, etc.), and empower the powerless; (4) create new employment opportunities that increase both take-home wages and flexibility around scheduling; and (5) change and improve how we live, work, and get around our physical environments.

An LP I know well pulled me aside recently to point out that investors who raise funds also, like entrepreneurs, have to go through a test — Who are you? What do you believe in? What do you stand for? Not too different from how The Joker described himself in The Dark Knight, sometimes in the pace of work, some investors can just revert to “dogs chasing cars.” I have felt that, for sure. But, after a while, that’s not good enough, according to that LP — and I think he’s right. Being able to invest, even small amounts like I do, is a sort of “Conch.” Diplomacy and statecraft are also Conches, in their own way. Now, everyone has one, and more people are using it — some of the sound encounters deconstructive interference, killing the signal; some, if we’re lucky, will eventually and constructively break through the noise to create bigger and louder waves.

Dissecting A Great Post On The Seed Stage

Manu Kumar of K9 Ventures posted an excellent, long but to-the-point, well-written post last night. (I’m only writing this b/c I had so many reactions that wouldn’t fit in a comments section.) If you are in the micro-VC world as an investor or LP, it’s something that should be bookmarked and re-read over and over. Here’s the link (click here). In this post, I wanted to call out a few quotes and go into them a bit more and explain why, from my POV, they’re critical:

The Cost of Startups: Kumar writes that…

while the infrastructure cost and startup costs may have declined, the operating costs have increased.

It’s a common refrain to hear people say that it costs much less to start a company, and even in a correction, that price won’t go up. It may likely go down. However, right now in the Bay Area, the other cost inputs (rent, salary, etc.) are spiking very high, and those costs are one factor driving up seed prices, in addition to the oversupply of capital.

What’s In A Name? Kumar writes…

Seed is not the first round of financing any more

We have distinct stages now: Pre-Seed, Seed, and Post-Seed, all coming before the classic bigger firms get involved. There are exceptions, of course, but it’s not uncommon to see a company go through all these rounds to get to a point to pitch the Big VC firm. Furthermore, each of these stages is also “institutionalized,” meaning that each check is a pool of other peoples’ money that has a business model attached to it, and therefore needs even more outsized returns to make for a viable fund.

Boiling A Frog. Kumar writes…

Almost like boiling a frog the micro-VCs who started out as “super angels” (See my post from 2011 on Investor Nomenclature and the Venture Spiral) writing $25K – $100K checks with personal money, are now managing funds which are $40M – $140M in size, some with multiple partners and are writing checks which are $750K – $1.5M. The change in thinking is a natural and logical thing. The catch however is that some of these funds and their GPs haven’t admitted to themselves and to founders and to LPs that their thinking has indeed changed (as it should). They are either in a state of denial or haven’t had the time to adjust their messaging yet.

This is absolutely happening, and one of my favorite lines in the post. These are the new Series A funds, but how it’s presented to founders and LPs may inadvertently not be the same.

How To Define Pre-Seed? Kumar writes…

the Pre-Seed round, where the startup raises closer to $500K, could flirt with $1M possibly.

Yes. He also wonders if GPs at smaller funds break ranks to go fill this “Pre-Seed” hole.

How Nomenclature Influences. Kumar writes…

Too many founders still think that. And then they see stuff in the press about how Company X and Company Y raised $2M in their seed round and start to think that that’s the amount that they should raise too.

The mimicry effect here is powerful. It’s very rare to meet a great founder who wants to raise a small, modest round early to test things, and it’s hard to stay disciplined when things can get oversubscribed given the excess of capital in the stage.

Beware “The Venture Spiral.” Kumar writes:

Moving up stream is a natural evolution of a venture fund, especially as you get more money and more partners. I refer to this as The Venture Spiral (blog post from 2008). Reflect on the stage you’re investing at and be sure that you’re staying within the bands of your competency (and ergo not riding the spiral up to a level of incompetency).

This resonates with me personally. I have been doing pre-, regular, and post-seed deals, and participating in a few As. But sometimes I worry about whether I can actually do a proper A round one day. From the outside, investing all looks the same, but when you’re doing it, you realize how different it is. Not comparable, and it’s hard to be a true multi-stage investor. Very few are excellent at it, but there is a temptation to raise more money as a GP as your previous funds go well.

What’s An LP To Do? Kumar writes:

Your early stage investment portfolio may no longer really be early stage

It’s harder for some more established funds to inform their LPs that they’re investing later and later in rounds, and the blurring of lines around the nomenclature can confuse things further. Some don’t care to ask, but Kumar is raising a great point: In a 10-year fund, an LP may sign up for “early-stage” exposure, but what does that mean as things have changed from 2012 to 2015?

The Deck Won’t Reshuffle. There’ll Be A New Deck. Kumar writes…

Micro-VCs are the new Series A investors…there will still be a new crop of Pre-Seed funds that will emerge…There is an opportunity for LPs to pick the right Pre-Seed stage funds, but I certainly don’t envy their job as it’s not going to be an easy task.

This is something I’ve lived unknowingly for two years. If I were an LP, I’d have no idea who to pick to invest in. When people ask “How are your investments going?” I usually answer “Great, but ask me in 5-7 years.” The truth is, we don’t know, and it takes time, and today’s environment expects two-year-to-billion-dollar status trajectories. The whole thing is much more random and haphazard than anyone (especially LPs) would care to admit.

Why Do Funds Get Bigger? Kumar writes…

The management fee structure provides a perverse incentive to GPs to increase the size of their funds.

Yep. On top of this, GPs can “stack funds” and earn fees on many funds at the same time. This makes what a firm like USV does even more impressive — staying under $200M and sometimes even raising less in a subsequent vintage.

Again, here is the whole post, which should be bookmarked and read and read again. Thanks to Manu for contributing this, he has helped me a lot in the past and this post continues to do the same.

The Ecosystem’s Body And Mind

For the past few years, everyone has publicly blogged and tweeted about whether or not the Valley is experiencing a “technology bubble.” The prevailing argument in support of there not being a bubble is that many of the big, growing startups of today have real revenues, solid fundamentals. If we think of the “body” as the fundamentals, things do appear to be in shape. Companies are growing, making money, addressing growing global markets, and we are definitely in a deployment phase of technology infiltrating even the least sexy of industries.

What about the “mind” then?

I started to think about this after watching this short video discussion between @Chamath (Social+Capital) and @JessicaLessin (The Information). I’d recommend watching the video above. Chamath covers a lot of ground about the frustration around mobile apps and why text is surging, or how the next Facebooks of the world will help us curate better content. The most interesting piece in my view, toward the end, is when Chamath starts talking about the potential “imbalance” in the SF Bay Area ecosystem, and specifically he models out why many late-stage private companies are potentially staring a world of hurt when public market prices are more rational. If and when that starts to break apart, he contends, it won’t hurt the general public, but it will likely hurt the rank and file employees at many growing startups.

These people, he contends, in turn, may start to leave the area and feel as if they were taken advantage of.

There’s an “American Dream,” and that’s been under all sorts of pressure as the proliferation of computing power in everyone’s pockets has helped reshape how business is done. There’s also a “Silicon Valley” dream (one that Chamath lived through), and while it appears to be the envy of the world, the implication and warning in this video is while the body/fundamentals are in great shape, the mind may not be.

Is the mind of SF Bay Area’s tech & startup ecosystem healthy? I don’t know the answer, but it’s a great question to ask and reflect on.

Option B

One of Mike Tyson’s most cited (and insightful) quotes often flies across Twitter: “Everybody has a plan until they’re punched in the face.” Tyson knows a thing or two about rearranging other peoples’ plans or having his own plans dismantled. Plans are what make Type A people stay sane. Plans make us feel safe, because we can control their creation, we can write them down, we can print them out, and we can cross off things on our lists. “There, it’s done. See? I did it.”

For those of you who know the “Option B Life” all too well, you may also understand how Option B sometimes grows and mutates in ways you couldn’t imagine, over time making Option A seem no longer savory. Or, some times, Option A comes back to present itself only after we’ve started down the path of Option B, but the psychology of sunk costs kicks in, and all of a sudden, when faced with choice, the difficulty of letting go of Option B is greater than the desire we have for Option A. “Everybody has planned their Option A until they’ve been punched in the face and now stare at Option B.”

I was thinking about Option A vs Option B today after reading and re-reading the beautiful, powerful, masterful post of grief by Sheryl Sandberg. I read her post a few times today while walking in San Francisco. And, I felt a range of emotions. To be candid, I first felt guilty because I remember when Facebook stumbled after their IPO, at the same time that Lean In was on tour, and I thought it was strange that she, as COO, was promoting the book while the company’s mobile app was struggling. I didn’t know what was really going on at the company, but that was my gut reaction. Second, when people started reviewing her book and then saying she’d be President of the United States, I thought “Please, give me a break.” Nice idea, but no way. Again, not knowing things directly, my mind had an impulse and instinctively came to a conclusion, even though now I’m not proud of it.

Then, today, Sandberg’s words dripped on my phone, making my eyes water, making my mind wander. Lines like this: “I have lived thirty years in these thirty days. I am thirty years sadder. I feel like I am thirty years wiser.” Whoa. And, then, this line, quoted from another: “Let me not die while I am still alive.” Sandberg ends her post by explaining how she yearns for Option A, but that now faced with what Tyson was talking about, she’s going to kick the shit out of Option B. In reading and re-reading this post, she seemed to transform right on my phone, in real-time, getting stronger and stronger.

The phrasing of “Option A vs B” struck a chord with me (though not on this level) because when asked about my career, I often talk about how my professional life has been one continuous chain of Option B after Option B after Option B. What I’m doing today? Option B. Tonight at dinner, someone correctly guessed that I wanted to attend Georgetown for college. I don’t know how they thought of this, but that was true. I applied early, I was not admitted. My goal was to work in international relations, specifically diplomacy. That dream subtly stuck in my brain all the way to graduate school, but all the major agencies I applied to (CIA, Foreign Service, etc.) rejected my applications. So, on to Plan B…again and again. I am not sure how after 35 years on Earth, I found a career via Option B. Like Tyson alluded to, I just assume I’ll be punched in the face, and there’s always an Option B even when it becomes Option A.

These professional matters of mine, however, are trivial compared to what I read today on Facebook. Her language was masterful. I am stunned she found the energy and clarity of mind to write something so beautiful given all the circumstances. Her Option B of being a daughter, a mom, a widow, a very public executive, succumbed by life to let others finally help her. And, I began to think how wrong my gut reactions were years ago, and how strong and insightful this individual is despite losing and grieving her beloved Option A. It makes me grateful to have an Option B (versus sad for losing Option A all the time), and it makes me want to root for her in her pursuit of her Option B, someone undoubtedly stronger than most of us could’ve imagined.

Haywire is written by Semil Shah, and is published under a Creative Commons BY-NC-SA license. Copyright © 2015 Semil Shah.

“I write this not for the many, but for you; each of us is enough of an audience for the other.”— Epicurus